FIREFIGHTER'S RULE OF GRAVITY:
Any tool, when dropped, will always come to rest in
the least accessible place possible.
THE FIRST RULE OF EQUIPMENT:
Any piece of firefighting equipment will never malfunction or fail until
you need it to fight a fire
b. the salesman leaves.
SECOND RULE OF EQUIPMENT:
Interchangeable parts don't, leak proof seals aren't
and self starters won't.
FIREFIGHTER'S RULES OF THE BATHROOM:
If you have just gone to the bathroom, no call will be
b. If you have not just gone to the bathroom, you will soon regret it.
The probability of receiving
a call increases proportionally to the time elapsed since last going to the
RULES OF WARNING DEVICES:
The use of a
siren on a firefighting vehicle while responding to a call will cause acute and
total (but temporary) deafness to the drivers of vehicles in its path.
b. The use of warning lights on a firefighting vehicle while responding to a
call will cause acute and total (but temporary) blindness to the drivers of
vehicles in its path.
FIREFIGHTER'S RULE OF LIGHT:
As the seriousness of any given situation increases,
the availability of light to illuminate the situation decreases.
FIREFIGHTER'S THEORY OF WEIGHT:
The weight of the equipment that you are about to
carry increases by the square of the sum of the distance to reach the situation.
FIREFIGHTER'S RULE OF RULES:
As soon as the firefighting rules are accepted as absolutes, an exception to
that rule will immediately occur.